From our friend Anne:
A local business was
looking for office help. They put a sign in the window saying:
HELP WANTED
Must be a good typist and be good with a computer.
Successful applicant must be bilingual.
We are an Equal Opportunity Employer.
A short time later a Weimaraner trotted up to the window, saw the sign and went
inside. He looked at the receptionist and wagged his tail, then walked
over to the sign, looked at it, whined and pawed the air. The receptionist
called the office manager. He was surprised, to say the least to see a canine
applicant. However, the dog looked determined, so he led him into the
office.
Inside, the dog jumped up on a chair and stared at the manager expectantly.
The manager said, "I can't hire you. The sign says you must be a good
typist. The dog jumped down, went to the typewriter, and proceeded to
quickly type a perfect business letter. He took out the page and trotted
over to the manager, gave it to him, then jumped back up on the chair.
The manager was stunned, but told the dog, "That was fantastic, but I'm
sorry. The sign clearly says that whoever I hire has to be good with a
computer." The dog jumped down again, went to the computer and
proceeded to demonstrate his expertise with various programs, produced a sample
spreadsheet and database, then presented them to the manager.
The manager was dumbfounded! He said to the dog, "Hey, I realize that
you are a very intelligent applicant and have fantastic talent, but you're a
dog. There is no way could I hire you! " The dog jumped down and went
to the sign in the window and pointed his paw at the words, "Equal
Opportunity Employer."
The exasperated manager said, "Yes, I know what the sign says. But
the sign also says you have to be bilingual." The dog looked him
straight in the eye and said,
'MEOW!'
From the Weim Quilt list!
It was a slow day in
Heaven.
"I am certainly bored," stated John.
"Me too," Paul chimed in.
Peter stood and watched the dogs. "I
know!" Peter began. "Why
don't we have a dog show?"
Paul and John thought that the idea was great, except for one small detail that
Paul pointed out. "Who are we to compete against, Peter?"
The trio pondered a moment when Peter realized the answer.
"We will call up Satan and invite him to the dog show.
All of the finest dogs here in heaven. All
of the National Specialty, all breed Best In Show, & High In Trial winners
are here. His kennel is riddled with the spoiled, difficult and mean dogs. We
are certain to win at the show!"
And so the Saints phoned Satan on the other realm communication lines and
invited him to their dog show.
Satan laughed and asked why they would want to be humiliated like that, because
he would certainly beat them.
Peter, Paul and John did not understand. "What do you mean Satan?" Peter asked.
"We have all of the National Specialty, All Breed Best In Show, and
High In Trial winners in our kennel in heaven.
How could you possibly beat us?"
Satan paused a moment and then laughed. "Have
you forgotten so soon gentlemen?....................I have all the judges!"
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